Cricket lingo | Sports humour

Image source : livescorecricket.in

Have you ever witnessed an interaction between a cricket lover and a stranger to cricket ? If not , then checkout the funny conversation between Pankaj , a cricket lover and Neal , a stranger to cricket .
                                                  

                                                               Part 1  

Pankaj              :  Yehhhhh LBW !!!

Neal                 :  What ! I thought its a family game

Pankaj              :  Well , it surely is . What made u think it isn't ?

Neal                 :  you said LBW , right ?

Pankaj              :   yeah , so ?

Neal                 :  You mean  the players are allowed to interact with their par tners before the wicket ?

Pankaj              :  What are you saying ?

Neal                 :  hey man ! isn't it love before wicket ? how can they possibly do that in front of a public audience .

Pankaj              :  Ghosh man ! you almost scared me . Its Leg before wicket , a sign of the batsman being  out and hence out of the field .

Neal (smiling)     :  Hell ! you should have told me first .. i had almost imagined the scene :)

Pankaj               :  Give me a break !

Neal                  :  Sure .. By the way what's E ?

Pankaj               :  E refers to economy .. its ..

Neal                  :  I didn't know cricket was such a fair and transparent game

Pankaj               :  What ? I mean Why ?

Neal                  :  All the money matters are discussed on the field . The game's so economical man ! I wonder why people accuse cricketers of being involved into import and export business

Pankaj               :  Give your mind some rest ! Economy means runs allowed per over and who said you that cricketers are involved in import , export business ?

Neal                  :  There were reports of people exporting towels and money to players while players imported them victory

Pankaj               :  That's match fixing man !

Neal  (disgusted):  They fix the match by putting towels in their pants ?

Pankaj               : Yes !

Neal                  :  Ghosh .. i didn't know cricketers were so gay .. and you said cricket was a family game

Pankaj               :  It is and what's gay about them ?

Neal                  :  Come on man ! towels ? What's the need of putting towels into pants unless you are trying to take the batsman to the dressing room ?

Pankaj(irritated):  Shut up you jerk ! what are you thinking ? Match fixing means playing according to directions of the bookies , before you ask me who bookies are .. bokkies are the ones who buy the players ...

Neal                  :  Okay ! but still what has that got to do with towels

Pankaj               :  Hell ! its just a sign to inform the bookie that he is on it .. got it dumb-ass ?

Neal                  :  Well yes !

                                                             Part 2 

Neal (amazed)     :  Hey bro ! i didn't know cricket had a tie with internet

Pankaj                 :  Internet ? Where did that come from ?

Neal                    :  Isn't that IP ? Does cricket too have a protocol ?

Pankaj                 :  No .. its not that protocol ?

Neal                    :  I got your point .. its "Interest Protocol" ! see , i told you they were not straight

Pankaj                 :  Idiot .. IP means " innings played"

Neal                     :  Oh ! Why do they have to relate everything to love , interest , attraction ? Anybody would doubt them

Pankaj                  :  Only idiots like you would do that

Neal                     :  I am not an idiot .. its their fault .. look at this "Short square leg"

Pankaj                  :  So ?

Neal                     : So ? I mean .. why is the commentator interested in the fielder's leg ?

Pankaj                  :  He isn't interested in the fielder's leg , i mean he is but ...

Neal                     :  See , there you go .. the cat is out of the bag .. you agree that they are ...

Pankaj                  :  Oh! give me a break , the commentator in interested in the fielders position

Neal                     :  Damn !

                                              Part 3 

Neal                    :  God! How are u even watching this game ? they are no less then MTV ?

Pankaj                 :  What ? MTV ?

Neal                    :  Yeah man ! see there , they have written 52* , 62* .. i mean , this is supposed to be a family show , how can they just beep the words !

Pankaj :               :  Great ! number followed by an asterix refers to the amount of runs made by the batsman and still being not out

Neal                     :  To hell with you and this game man ! they have such perverted abbreviations for every term .

Pankaj                  :  It isn't the game which is perverted , you are a pervert !

Neal                     :  Whatever man ! i like this game .. shut up and watch it

Pankaj                  :  You are impossible

Neal                     :  But i am not a cricketer , so do not expect anything of that sort from me

Pankaj                  :  means ?

Neal                     :  towels , interest ...  ;)

Pankaj                  :  Come on man ! stop being such a jerk and enjoy the game .


I hope you enjoyed it too .